Valentine’s Day seems innocent enough but for those of us who have lost a beloved sweetheart the thought of Valentine’s Day approaching is not something we take lightly. Our hearts have been shattered and this manufactured day serves as another reminder that they are gone. Feeling that void can seem overpowering and suffocating to our … More Valentine’s Day: Opening Our Hearts Again To Love
Photo by: Bill Clark I have been lingering in some substantial resistance to recounting the story of what happened to my husband Claude. How did such a vibrant man who loved life, seemingly had it all and actually feared death to the core of his being arrive at such a desperate place that he felt suicide … More Claude’s Path To Suicide
Words have been circulating in my mind for the past couple of days, pleading with me to sit down and write. I have felt resistant for fear of how these words would be received and knowing that this post is deviating a bit from my established theme of sharing my story and grief support. But … More Reflections: We Are All One
With Independence Day upon us, it feels appropriate to crack the hatch wide open. Giving myself permission and the freedom to start revealing my thoughts and feelings as a suicide survivor and beginning to tell a more detailed account of my story relating to Claude’s death. I see this taking place over several blog posts; … More Claude’s Suicide: Freedom To Speak My Truth
One more year rolls around and I notice that Father’s Day still tugs at my heart. My dad died 12 years ago. It saddens me that I was not able to be there with him when he passed, but thankfully he was not alone, other family members where there including my mom, surrounding him with … More Layers Of Grief On Father’s Day
I am remembering with such sweetness, my wedding day with Claude. Yesterday would have been our 21st wedding anniversary. That day was infused with anticipation, stunning clear blues skies on the coast of Northern CA, the sound of the crashing ocean waves below us as we said our wedding vows surrounded by an intimate group of family and … More Sweet Memories Of Our Wedding Day
No matter how you slice it, saying goodbye is never easy. It’s painful! We have many situations in our lives that require us to say goodbye to what has been familiar and most important to us. It can be a final goodbye as with death or at times it is just a change in the … More Saying Goodbye
I am reflecting back on this month of May as it draws to a close. There are changes that on the surface feel challenging, yet going deeper can be experienced as exciting for the potential they hold. Typically change can bring with it resistance in our human experience. Change can trigger fear of the unknown. … More Trusting Change
While we are caught in the perpetual waves of grief we are called to go deep, to determine what we are made of. In the process, learning who we are as a spirit or soul and why we are here. Always holding in our consciousness that we are much more than this personality self. Much … More Enchanted by the Past: Caught In The Perpetual Waves Of Grief
I would like to honor my mom’s memory today. It has been eight years since she passed away beautifully and on her own terms in hospice care at the age of 83. I was blessed to be by her side when her spirit peacefully left her body. I can say with certainty that it was … More Missing Mom on Mother’s Day