Last week I was standing in my kitchen when my heart sank as I remembered that February 28, 2018 will be the ten-year anniversary of my moms’ passing. I also realized that both mom and Claude died in leap years, what are the chances! Tears instantly filled my eyes and I soon found myself sobbing. … More Remembering Mom After Ten Years
I have been working on my memoir over the past few months, writing about my experiences since my husband Claude died by suicide over five years ago. On the surface as I have faced this unimaginable loss it might appear that feeling any sense of gratitude would be elusive or unattainable. However, as I review … More Grief And Gratitude This Thanksgiving
I am feeling grateful and renewed after spending a week in Southern CA. I went there to spend some quiet time by the sea with one of my beloved soul sisters and her family, and to reclaim my connection to the Pacific coast.I had forgotten how blissful it is to walk barefoot on the beach … More Lifelines: Keeping Us Afloat As We Grieve
For days now it seems that every time I look out the window or sit out on my patio I see the graceful and seemingly effortless flight of a Yellow Swallowtail butterfly. On my morning walks I see tiny white butterflies, sometimes in groups, that dance and fly as if they are celebrating life in … More What The Butterfly Can Teach Us About Grief
I was reminded the other day during a conversation with a friend that today June 11th is my wedding anniversary. In the moment I thought it was odd that I had completely forgotten and that I honestly felt nothing. I remember thinking I would just let the day pass without any acknowledgement whatsoever. However, during … More Love: Still Something To Celebrate Even After We Lose Our Beloved
I felt a sense of peace being back home in Boulder after my awesome visit to Asheville. My heart felt enriched and satisfied. Waking up in my comfy bed that first day back I felt a renewed sense of purpose and enthusiasm, ready to start this new chapter, this new decade. As I descended the … More Following My Courageous Heart – Part Two
Being born in May could be why I relish the spirit of springtime. Everything is re-awakening with vibrant potentiality. Yet this birthday in particular, I am saddened that Claude is not by my side to usher me across the threshold of the BIG 60! On my 40th he cleverly hosted a surprise party at our … More My 60th Birthday: Following My Courageous Heart – Part One
Why anger? Is suicide seen as the ultimate form of betrayal? Is it that on the surface it appears that those who committed the act had a choice? I read a blog a few weeks ago in which the blogger’s condemnation of Robins William’s suicide was pretty apparent. My sense is that he is not … More The Intimate Link Between Anger and Suicide